A Conversation With My Mother

“Helen, I’ve been reading your blog.”

“Oh God, what did you think?”

“It’s very good – you’re funny. Although I try not to read some of the more sexually explicit stuff – to me you’re still the five-year-old girl with bunches in her hair sporting a Barbie backpack.”

“I don’t write anything sexually explicit – I lead a very boring life.”

“And another thing, I am a bit worried about how often write that you’re crying. I don’t want to hear about you crying in the shower, are you okay?”

“Mother, I’m fine, I’m not always crying – sometimes I exaggerate”

“Well okay, I’d better go anyway. A woman of my age – when you need the toilet you just have to go”

“Mother, don’t you dare say anything else. If you give me any more information about the menopause I’ll write about you in my blog.”

I’m sorry Mother, but I had to. Please don’t worry about me, you’ve given me everything I need.

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37 responses to “A Conversation With My Mother

  1. Please never show your mom my blog.

    Like

  2. deepbluesandseafoamgreens

    YOU BRAVE SOUL.
    I would have crawled up in the laundry basket if my mum was all “so about those exam BOO BOOS?!!!!”

    Like

  3. That’s cool you have the kind of relationship where you let your Mum read your blog, My Mum wants to read mine, but I told her no way.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. If my mother saw my blog she would have an instant aneurysm. Your mom is cool *trying to get brownie points from your mom*

    Liked by 1 person

  5. If my mom saw my blog, I would have to hide my face from her peripheral vision and probably sleep over at my friend’s house.

    Like

  6. Ha ha, love how you ended up writing about your mom anyway! Great humor in this post, and I like how open you are with your mother – not everyone is so lucky. (:

    Like

  7. The Howling Fantogs

    I would be mortified if my mother ever read my blog. Kudos to you for showing it to her.

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    • Thank you – my sister spilled the beans about my blog so now I have no choice but to let her read it. A scary prospect!

      Like

      • The Howling Fantogs

        I told the first of my friends about my blog last weekend. Luckily he was drunker than me so probably won’t remember.

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’ve had a read of a few of your posts and have been really enjoying them. The way you write is so engaging – I’m sure if your friend reads it he’ll feel the same way! 🙂

        Like

  8. haha. thats sweet! 🙂
    love the humour in the post.

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  9. Love this! And I recognise it, too. The “cool” mum being so utterly “matter of fact” about it all. Just know she’s probably nearly dying too! Can’t wait ’til my daughter’s old enough to be in this position. Ahem.

    Like

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